You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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