Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
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