I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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