he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
You made out with two different species that night
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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