I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
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