gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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