Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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