FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
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