i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize