Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
i was born a porn star she said
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
