we have pet lesbian snakes
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
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so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
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Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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