the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize