so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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