Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
