I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Randomize
