i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
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