So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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