I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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