Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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