Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
