Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
