around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Randomize
