i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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