Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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