I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I need a beard to bite.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
