He is such a slut. More and more my type.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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