what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
