wanna go halves on a baby?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
