How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
