Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
