The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
