Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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