she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
