I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Randomize