did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize