i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
