Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize