A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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