I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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