the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
