Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
