Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
