one word: firstdatebathroomanal
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize