Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
