Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook