just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize