It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
