I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize