He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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