the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
