oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
